Riding That Sex High For as Long as Possible
"Life is short, have an affair"--the tag line for Ashley Madison
When I left my lover, I was euphoric—riding the sex high for as long as possible.
Why?
Because I knew I would never get sex at home, so I needed to stretch this feeling out. My pussy was deliciously sore. My panties soaked. My body felt used.
While picking up coffee, I replayed the scenes in my head.
“I can’t believe he did that!”
“Oh my God, I was moaning so loud.”
“How does he know exactly what to do?”
My secret smiles were for me alone. I might have blushed if I had any decency left.
“You were delicious today,” my lover texted
“Hey, what are you smirking at?” my husband would ask when I got home.
“Nothing, just something funny I read,” I said, pointing to my phone.
Little did he know…
(Ah, the not-so-secret smiles. The telltale evidence of having a lover. It was so difficult to hide happiness.)
He could never guess that his conservative wife of 20 years had a secret lover. If we ever had sex, I might not have needed one.
My libido wasn’t so easily restrained.
“Normal couples” had sex a few times a week, studies say. In my marriage, it’s been years of zero sex. Until I couldn’t take it anymore — I went looking for a man.
Every day I masturbated like a fiend thinking of my lover, counting down the days until we’d see each other again. Once a week wasn’t enough. I wanted more. I needed his body in mine. I longed for it. My desire had reached a fever pitch.
No more denial, I decided.
So, I rode the sex high. I touched myself every chance I got. I sexted him.
“I want your mouth on me.”
“I need you pounding me hard.”
“I can’t get enough of you.”
I didn’t even hesitate to press send.
“You are so sexual,” he said. “I love it. Never had a woman like you.”
The joy of having an affair meant I didn’t have to temper my desires. He knew my need. He was more than willing to help me extinguish the flames. No pretending. I was on fire for him.
Driving to the hotel room, I could feel my lacy underwear getting damp.
“I’m so horny for you,” I texted. “I’m getting wet already.”
“Good, can’t wait.”
“You do things to me that I can’t believe.”
“I’ll do anything you want,” he said.
“Anything?”
“Absolutely. I want to make you happy,” he said.
Happy? How novel! That hasn’t happened in forever in my marriage.
I’m on board with happy. And fulfilled.
“You are so sexy,” he whispered in bed afterward; we were lying together.
“I feel sexy with you.”
I couldn’t remember the last time I felt desirable at home.
Passion was part of the promise. Cheating felt insanely right. Like nothing else I had ever done.
“I was always a good girl,” I said. “Who knew what I was missing?”
“Bad girls have more fun,” he replied.
“Yes, they do!”
And in middle age, I was ready for lust. Being 50 made me decide that it wasn’t too late.
“Life is short. Have an affair.” The tagline for Ashley Madison, the site for married lovers to find each other.
Life was indeed short, I decided. Nothing was off the table.
That post-sex haze was intoxicating. I wanted more.
“When can we see each other again?” I asked.
“Next week.”
“I can’t wait.”
This was written about my third affair. What was your best sex high? Was it with a lover? Tell me in the comments.
After not having sex with anyone for 12 years - while in a same-sex marriage, I finally had sex with a sex worker in Amsterdam... I also smiled to myself for many days afterward! I thought I'd catch a whiff of her scent for at least 3 weeks afterward...and it would make my stomach drop a bit and get me wet.
That was 5.5 months ago and I have 2 more weeks before I see her again... it's starting to get me excited again!!!